Are Some People Meant To Be Single?

Not everybody experiences relationships in the same way. While some people find intimacy and romance to be effortless and filled with joy, others struggle to make romantic relationships work. If you’ve given relationships a try however they haven’t worked, you may be wondering, like others, that  you may be better off single. 

Being single can sometimes be the right choice. You may not feel ready to enter a romantic relationship, feel like you need to work on yourself, or simply feel like relationships are not for you. Still, if starting and facilitating a relationship is something you want to work on, attending a specialized workshop may provide you with the resources and skills you need.

In this article, we will discuss what it means to be alone and whether some people are more suited to a solitary life, Read on. 

Are Some People Meant To Be Alone?

Is It Bad That I Like To Be Alone

For many people, being alone can be a frightening prospect. They might yearn to find that special someone and enter a committed relationship with them, and the thought of being alone may terrify them. On the other hand, there are people who seem to be entirely content with being single. They aren’t too interested in entering a serious relationship or any relationship for that matter, and the idea of spending most of their time alone doesn’t sound all that bad. 

However, there are other people who might long to be in a relationship and feel included, but they’ve felt rejected or unlovable for most of their life. This can fuel rage and hostility, and cause these individuals to withdraw and distance themselves from everybody in their life. 

No matter where you fall on this spectrum, remember that there’s no shame in being single for whatever reason just like there’s no shame in committing yourself to a serious relationship. Everyone is different in the way they approach love and relationships. 

Is It Bad That I Like To Be Alone?

If you feel perfectly comfortable spending most of your time on your own, engaging in your favorite activities, why would that be a bad thing? You may feel like being alone gives you a feeling of integrity and independence, or you may embrace your alone time more than other people around you. After all, your happiness is what matters. 

If you do feel deep down that you’re avoiding relationships because of a deep-seated fear of vulnerability or a feeling of being unlovable, you may not actually like being alone. But how can you tell? How can you know for sure whether you’re choosing to be alone for your own happiness and wellbeing or shielding yourself from something? 

If you’re wondering, consider the following statements and see if they apply to you. 

1. You feel genuinely happy when you’re single 

For some people, being single and alone can be a source of stress, anxiety, and sadness. These people may feel like their self-worth and self-esteem are diminished when they’re not in a relationship. However, people who truly enjoy being single cherish their moments of solitude. If you feel genuinely satisfied with your current situation and being alone brings you a sense of contentment, it’s likely that you fall into the latter category. 

2. You have your ways of doing things 

Do you have a routine that benefits you and don’t like when people disturb it? Relationships take a great deal of effort and compromise, and you may have little desire to change your routine. This can be a good sign that you’d be happier being alone in the long run. 

3. You’re focused on your self improvement and career

Relationships are not a top priority for everyone. You may be set on achieving your career goals or simply want to become the best person you can be without basing your worth on the opinions of others. You may also have a large group of friends who provide you with the support and connection you need to feel included. If your current life doesn’t leave much room for relationships and you feel content with that, then a single life may be a great fit for you. 

4. You don’t feel lonely

There’s a great difference between loneliness and being alone. Individuals who fear being single experience feelings of isolation and loneliness and don’t feel comfortable spending time on their own. On the other hand, people who enjoy being single don’t feel isolated and unhappy when alone. They may be quite friendly, social, and active, while thoroughly enjoying quality alone time. Choosing to be alone doesn’t mean choosing loneliness. 

Do Loners Fall In Love?

Often, loners aren’t averse to affection and relationships, they just don’t go out of their way to find them. If you identify yourself as a loner, that doesn’t necessarily mean that you can’t or don’t want to fall in love. It may simply be that you just haven’t met the right person yet. If you do have a desire to enter a relationship, it is quite likely that you’ll run into someone who values your individuality, shares your interests, and respects your alone time. 

Can Loners Be Happy?

Do Loners Fall In Love

When you hear the word ‘loner’, you may get the stereotypical picture of an individual who doesn’t like people, withdraws to spend their time inside their own home, and harbors resentment because of their isolated lifestyle. However, many people who enjoy being alone aren’t angry, bitter, or disenchanted, but simply embrace their alone time. They tend to feel good about themselves and appreciate the rich inner world they created in solitude. In fact, their independent and self-sufficient nature can make them rather attractive to others. 

The bottom line is that you can be perfectly happy alone, but only if you feel comfortable with yourself and feel no resentment towards others. If you’re not alone by choice and want to change that, however, you can find the support you need to find true happiness in a relationship. 

Attend A Relationship Building Skills Workshop And Find Connection 

Whether you feel happy alone but want to bring some change into your life or you’re tired of spending your time in solitude, make sure to contact PIVOT. We are a team of compassionate and dedicated relationship specialists who can help you facilitate positive change. We offer both individual coaching tailored to each client and intensive workshops for couples who want to work on their relationship. No matter what your needs may be, you can count on us to provide you with a personalized coaching experience and help boost your wellbeing. Contact us today. 

Not Satisfied In Your Relationship? Here’s Why That May Be

Do you feel like no matter what you do or which turn your life takes, you can’t seem to be content with the way things are? Or are you in a relationship that ‘should’ make you happy, but you still feel unsatisfied? 

There is a whole range of reasons why you may feel unhappy in your relationship and life in general. If you are looking for a way to improve your relationship and your overall well being, and find happiness in the little things, private couple retreats for reconnection may help. In the meantime, keep on reading to find out why you may be unhappy and what you can do to change that.  

Why Am I Not Satisfied In A Relationship? 

What Causes A Person Not To Be Satisfied

Continuously wanting more out of life is a common human condition. Often, we learn at an early age to compare ourselves to other people. Later in life we feel like our current dissatisfaction of not enough can only be cured by getting more recognition and power, a better job, or a better partner. We seem to be reaching for something that remains out of grasp or cling to something long gone. 

If you’re not sure if you recognize yourself in this, think about the thoughts that intrude your mind on a daily basis. Do you constantly think about how things should be or should have been, are you continuously doubting and evaluating your choices?   Are you longing for something that keeps slipping away? 

This can be seen as having a ‘wanting mind’ that causes us to not feel satisfied, regardless of what we actually do have in life. If you’re unsure if having a wanting mind is what’s making you unhappy, remember the last time you craved for something and managed to obtain it. How long did the satisfaction caused by attaining the object of your longing last? How long after did you start longing for something else? The root of the problem here is that we keep replacing old desires with new ones, due to a belief that we’ll find the key to happiness in something outside of ourselves, instead of looking within. 

What Causes A Person Not To Be Satisfied?

Our tendency to want more can be explained in several ways. Here are some root causes of having a ‘wanting mind’: 

  1. Our expectations:

    As you achieve more success, whether financial or social, your expectations are likely to increase in tandem. This leads to a feeling of dissatisfaction. However, this doesn’t mean that lowering your expectations is the way to go. If you do this, you’ll only be selling yourself short. 

  2. Comparing ourselves to others:

    Many people can’t escape the temptation to compare themselves to the success of others. The grass is greener mentality can cause us to keep competing and searching for something outside ourselves in order to find happiness. 

  3. Hedonic adaptation:

    The concept of hedonic adaptation has a lot to do with how our expectations change along with our circumstances. Humans are prone to quickly adapting to the negative and positive events in life and returning to their happiness base level. Once we become accustomed to one thing, it can be quite difficult to go back. 

What Do You Do When You’re Not Satisfied In A Relationship?

While you may be struggling with a constant feeling of dissatisfaction caused by a ‘wanting mind’, it may also be the case that your relationship isn’t actually meeting your needs. After all, if you don’t feel good in a relationship, whether because your partner doesn’t value your integrity, you have no common interests, or you’d simply prefer to be alone, then it may not be the right one for you. A good way to deal with dissatisfaction in a relationship is to be honest with your partner and yourself, communicate openly, and discuss any issues you may be dealing with. 

How Do I Increase Satisfaction In A Relationship?

Whether you’re dealing with an overall sense of dissatisfaction or feel unhappy in your relationship, there’s no reason to beat yourself up over it. There are ways to increase your satisfaction and nurture relationships that meet your needs. Here are some tips: 

  • Set realistic expectations: setting your expectations too high or too low can exacerbate your sense of dissatisfaction. Instead, try to set goals for yourself that are firmly based in reality and aren’t out of your reach. 
  • Increase self-awareness: by getting to know yourself better with all your virtues and flaws, you can learn to be more humble and realistic. Looking inward can also help you avoid basing your sense of worth on external sources. 
  • Express gratitude: in order to break the shackles of a wanting mind, you can try teaching yourself to be thankful for what you have. Being grateful for even the smallest things in your life can help increase your overall happiness. 
  • Celebrate your successes: why not congratulate yourself for your accomplishments, both large and small? This may be as little as getting out of bed in the morning or starting to work out regularly. Celebrating your wins can help boost your confidence and life satisfaction. 
  • Be open and honest: communicating your needs and wants with your partner in a positive manner can enhance your intimacy and trust. It is also important to try and be honest with yourself and identify realistic paths for growth. 

Visit Our Relationship Coaching Retreat For Individuals And Increase Your Life Satisfaction 

How Do I Increase Satisfaction In A Relationship

Sometimes, trying to understand yourself and your life situation can become overwhelming. Instead of withdrawing and giving up, you can pick yourself up and work on your emotional wellbeing with a little push. At PIVOT, we work hard to help individuals and couples deal with their relationship problems and the general demands of everyday life. 

Whether you are an individual looking for a compassionate relationship coach or want to attend an intensive workshop with your partner, the dedicated staff at PIVOT is at your beck and call. Reach out to us now and take the first step towards lasting happiness. 

Is Honesty Always The Best Policy?

Most people would probably agree that being honest and authentic in your romantic relationship is crucial for nurturing a lasting bond. In fact, a great deal of intimacy problems in a relationship can be resolved with open communication and a willingness to embrace vulnerability. After all, isn’t it good to strive to get to know the people closest to us and let them know our most vulnerable thoughts and feelings, too? Why would we hide anything from the person we care the most about? 

Naturally, honesty has a crucial role to play in relationships. However, the idea that honesty is always the best policy is not absolute. There is a definite grey area in all relationships, just like life in general. With the exception of intentionally lying in order to cheat or trick your partner, there certainly can be some situations in which diplomacy and honesty may be at conflict. 

Is It Best To Be Honest In A Relationship All The Time?

How Does Honesty Affect Relationships

It’s highly likely that you’d get a positive answer to the question of whether honesty is important in relationships from most people around you. But the key here is to discuss what honesty means to each individual. For some, being honest means being open to your partner about your whereabouts, about your personal history, or your deep fears and insecurities. 

For others, however, honesty may mean saying what you mean at all times, even if it means offending or hurting your partner. If honesty means open and constant criticism for you, you may find yourself struggling to maintain a relationship or make your partner feel unlovable and unworthy. 

Private Thoughts 

This is not the only grey area when it comes to honesty in relationships, however. Most people have extremely private thoughts that they are hesitant to disclose to others, no matter how close they may be. They may even be dishonest with themselves about their most private and vulnerable thoughts. 

These private thoughts may range from completely harmless, such as finding a stranger on the plane cute, to those that may be more hurtful to your partner, such as having a sexual fantasy with a person you both know. While it may seem like you or your partner are not supposed to have such thoughts, they are perfectly natural, and disclosing them may only create doubt and uncertainty in your relationship. 

How Does Honesty Affect Relationships?

Honesty is a cornerstone of any lasting relationship. It can help create a sense of trust and safety for both you and your partner and help you overcome any challenges that come your way without fear. Here are some other positive effects of honesty in relationships: 

  • By being honest, you can help your partner to better understand you and find ways for your relationship to grow
  • Honesty can prevent doubt and suspicion in your relationship. Your partner won’t have to guess what you’re feeling and thinking.
  • If you lie or withhold important information about yourself from your partner, they are likely to feel betrayed and hurt, which may breed resentment.
  • By nurturing a relationship based on trust, you can learn to be more honest with yourself as well. If you and your partner are able to listen to each other without judgement, you’ll be less ashamed of your less gracious acts and thoughts. 

Overall, honesty can greatly increase your satisfaction in a relationship. Without it, you may get stuck in a relationship you’re unhappy with or be unable to overcome your fear of vulnerability

Can Honesty Hurt A Relationship?

Just like with many other things in life, the role of honesty in relationships isn’t as clear cut as it may seem at first glance. Complete, uninhibited honesty can have a number of negative consequences on relationships. Of course, these effects of honesty can vary depending on your and your partner’s personalities. For instance, some people value directness, even if it means receiving criticism from their partner. Other people, however, may be more defensive or prone to internalizing even the slightest negative remarks. 

People come from different backgrounds and have different expectations of relationships. You and your partner may both be comfortable with sharing even the most private thoughts with each other, but that may not be the case in all relationships. Respect, understanding, and mutual trust are often dependent on honesty, but may also depend on the unique nature of each person and the relationship in question. 

How Can I Be Honest In A Relationship?

If you want to nurture a relationship based on honesty and trust, but maintain some balance, consider the following tips: 

  1. Aim for mutual trust.

    Discuss the meaning of trust with your partner. For many people, trust means no secrecy and deceptiveness, feeling heard in the relationship, and feeling free to be yourself while you’re with your partner. 

  2. Not everything has to be shared.

    Honesty doesn’t necessarily mean full disclosure. It also doesn’t mean constant white lies and selectiveness with truth. Instead, it means that our minds are complex and chaotic, with thoughts and feelings that often don’t matter as much as we think they do. 

  3. Think before you speak.

    It is common for people to blurt out everything that’s on their minds to alleviate some of their insecurities or anxiety. However, this may put your partner under too much pressure to provide support 24/7. 

  4. Don’t expect full disclosure from your partner either.

    We simply can’t know everything that goes through another person’s mind. Also, some people are simply more comfortable with sharing their thoughts and feelings than others. Even if your partner is somewhat withdrawn, that doesn’t mean that they’re unhappy. 

  5. Think about the effect of your honesty.

    Think about how you’d feel if your partner said the same thing to you as you said to them. If honesty means just criticizing your partner, take a step back and see what the purpose for your honesty actually is.  

  6. Learn to listen.

    If you have a lot of thoughts and want to share all of them with your partner, it’s only fair that you let them do the same. Make sure to listen to what your partner has to say without judgement. After all, honesty is a two way street. 

Establish Balance Through Transformative Relationship Intimacy Coaching

Can Honesty Hurt A Relationship

Whether you’re struggling with honesty in your relationship, need help maintaining your integrity, or worry that your relationship will be ruined by a lack of affection, don’t hesitate to contact PIVOT. We can provide you with the relationship-building skills you need to improve your relationship and attain emotional stability. Our expertly designed individual coaching sessions and couple retreats are designed to bring positive change into your life and help you heal your core emotional wounds. Get in touch with us now. 

Integrity In Relationships: Why It Matters

In order for an intimate relationship to be successful, some compromise is often necessary. When a relationship is based on fairness, open communication, and trust, both partners are likely to feel heard, valued, and secure. However, it is not uncommon for partners to go overboard when trying to meet their partner’s needs and expectations, at the expense of their own. 

Although integrity may have different meanings for different people, it can be said that having integrity in a relationship means being able to adhere to your principles and values while treating your partner with due respect and consideration. While open cooperation in relationships often means willingly giving up certain wants and desires, it can be quite difficult to achieve balance, especially when important needs are concerned. 

If you or your partner struggle with maintaining integrity, learning to build trust in a relationship in a specialized workshop may provide you with the necessary insight and skills. In the meantime, read on to find out what integrity means in relationships and how you and your partner can achieve it.  

Why Is Integrity Important In Relationships?

Integrity often entails vulnerability, honesty, and authenticity. It is based on respect, kindness, and gentleness that serve to maintain your own sense of worth and ensure the success of your relationship. While you don’t have to agree with your partner on all occasions, you can treat them with compassion and openness. This may mean discussing important issues and making decisions together with your partner, while trying to accommodate their needs, as well as your own. 

A relationship that lacks integrity, on the other hand, may involve keeping score, blaming, devaluing the other person’s needs, and bringing up past hurts. Instead, integrity may mean staying committed to resolving the problem at hand with kindness, humor, and compassion.

What Are Signs Of Integrity?

In the basic sense of the term, integrity means being honest and having strong moral principles. Individuals with integrity may show some or all of the following traits: 

  • Taking responsibility for one’s actions: an individual with integrity recognizes that their behavior has impacts on other people and is willing to adjust it. Keep in mind that this doesn’t mean pleasing everyone. Instead, it means that you strive to be the best person you can be, for yourself and others. 
  • Praising the successes of other people: when you have integrity, you don’t feel threatened by other people’s accomplishments. You help other people feel good about themselves, too instead of putting them down. 
  • Not using personal attacks in arguments: integrity means being able to stand your ground in an argument without finger pointing and name calling. You are able to understand both points of view and remain calm and collected when arguing. 
  • Willingness to listen: similarly, a person with integrity may rarely assume. Instead, they know that there often are at least two different sides to each story, and take their time to listen and ask questions before acting. 
  • Valuing the needs of others: integrity doesn’t mean sacrificing for others in a way that damages your own well-being. On the contrary, it usually means putting others first in a way that shows respect and dedication. 

How Does Integrity Build Trust?

What Are Signs Of Integrity

Integrity is key for building trust, both in ourselves and our relationships. You may build self-trust by monitoring and evaluating your behaviors so as to understand your principles and whether your actions are in tune with them. You can build trust in other people by observing how they behave and get to know their principles, too, and see whether your principles match. 

If you maintain integrity in a relationship, you can create a foundation of trust, enabling both yourself and your partner to feel valued and respected. This may enhance relationship satisfaction and longevity, especially if both parties are dedicated to building trust. 

How To Keep Your Integrity In A Relationship?

If you are worried about losing your integrity in a relationship, consider the following tips: 

  1. Share your values with your partner and make sure they understand what is important to you.

    This way, your partner may find it easier to respect your values, and you may also encourage them to speak about what matters to them, too. 

  2. Leave room for some alone time.

    This doesn’t necessarily mean that you have to be exactly ‘alone’. Instead, it means having enough time to focus on your own hobbies or social activities, especially if you and your partner have few common interests.  

  3. Strive for honesty and trust.

    Trust and integrity tend to go hand in hand. A relationship that is based on honesty often entails a sense of integrity, as both partners feel like they can share their vulnerabilities with each other. 

  4. Keep your expectations in check.

     If you feel unhappy in your relationship, it may be the case that you are expecting too much or too little from your partner. You might be expecting your partner to respect your decisions without respecting their own, or your partner may not be as dedicated to making the relationship work as you are. 

  5. Attend a relationship workshop.

    If you’re struggling to maintain a steady relationship based on integrity and trust, reaching out to professionals may be exactly what you need. Coaching experts rely on tried-and-true practices to help you and our partner find common ground. 

Attend A PIVOT Couple Workshop For Deepening Your Relationship

How Does Integrity Build Trust

At PIVOT, we take a compassionate, holistic approach to helping individuals and couples achieve lasting relationship happiness. Through individual coaching designed to target your core wounds and highly focused workshops for couples, we can provide you with the resources and knowledge you need to heal and facilitate positive change in your life. 

If you are ready to take the first step towards achieving emotional equilibrium, make sure to get in touch with PIVOT. Our dedicated team can tailor your coaching experience to your unique needs and give you a chance to improve your wellbeing. Get in touch with us today and start working on a better you. 

Relationship Affection: How Important Is It?

Being affectionate, loving, and caring in your relationship is a vital aspect of it that, when lacking, can not only cause other problems to appear, such as experiencing profound relationship sadness or being part of an increasingly apathetic relationship. And that is why it is a  good idea to deal with potential issues in your relationship as soon as you see them arise.

However, sometimes it is simply not possible to resolve certain relationship problems alone with your partner, and there comes a time when it seems the only thing that remains is to attend a relationship building skills workshop. While this is a good idea, as professional coaches can really help, it doesn’t hurt to learn more about what lack of affection can do to a relationship.

How Important Is Affection In A Relationship?

Affection is very important in a relationship, as it helps both partners experience an increased sense of harmony, love, and mutual understanding. Giving, as well as receiving affection, simply helps create a safer and more caring relationship.

And that goes for all aspects of affection, not just physical and sexual intimacy. Emotional affection is equally important as its physical counterpart, and some would argue that there is no true physical affection without emotional one.

So, affection is important, and not just because of the reasons already mentioned. There’s more to why affection is so important:

  • It releases plenty of feel-good hormones.
  • Affection helps create a more trusting relationship.
  • Physical affection helps reduce blood pressure.
  • Being affectionate with your partner reduces stress hormones.
  • Increased affection can be associated with increased relationship satisfaction.

Why Can’t I Show Affection To My Partner?

Why Can’t I Show Affection To My Partner

Experiencing inability to express affection towards your partner can be very detrimental to your relationship, especially if the issue persists for prolonged periods of time. However, being aware of this fact does little to help you overcome the problem of not showing affection. 

That is why, to begin with, it is important to become aware of several common reasons why you might be unable to express affection to your partner. Potentially succeeding in identifying the underlying cause of your inability to show affection is the first step in working towards resolving that problem.

  • You might be dealing with high levels of anxiety that are preventing you from being affectionate with your partner.
  • You could have a lower need level when it comes to expressing affection, which stops you from giving your partner the affection they need.
  • You may have a different preconception of what expressing affection looks like and what affection actually is. 
  • You might currently be affected by a recent difficult situation you have experienced which is stopping you from being affectionate. 
  • You could be feeling the negative effects of a hidden medical or psychological condition that requires assistance from a professional.

Is It Normal To Have No Affection In A Relationship?

Talking in terms of normal and not normal or abnormal is neither correct nor suitable terminology when discussing anything related to relationship issues. All people are unique, and so are their relationships. What works for one couple may not work for another, and vice versa. 

However, extreme absence of any kind of affection between partners can be increasingly detrimental to any relationship, as it is usually a sign of a different underlying issue that can leave more serious consequences. These are some of the most usual reasons behind lack of affection in a relationship:

  1. Difference in boundaries

    Sometimes, not showing affection can have its root in previous failed attempts by one of the partners that originated due to different internal boundaries concerning showing affection.

  2. Feeling too comfortable

    Being overly comfortable can lead to one or both partners beginning to neglect showing affection to each other. 

  3. Experiencing improper balance

    Current lack of affection can easily be caused by one or both partners focusing on other aspects of their lives, leaving little time to pay attention to being affectionate with each other. 

  4. Fearing intimacy

    It is quite common for a person to fear being affectionate with their partner, which stems from their potentially unresolved fears of intimacy, as they perceive intimacy and affection as connected, which they certainly can be. 

  5. Personal insecurities

    Finally, an individual could be experiencing personal insecurities that can negatively affect their relationship by preventing them from showing affection to their partner. 

Can Lack Of Affection Ruin Relationships?

Yes, lack of affection can negatively impact any relationship, and it can eventually lead to one or both partners beginning to lose connection to each other, which can inflict serious repercussions to any relationship.

Experiencing lack of affection is a pretty common occurrence. However, allowing it to persist and not finding a solution can cause the flame of love to become smaller, eventually leading to more serious problems that could potentially ruin a relationship. That is why it is a good idea to address relationship problems as they arise. 

Join A Couple Relationship Management Workshop At Pivot And Resolve Your Issues

Is It Normal To Have No Affection In A Relationship

Missing affection in a relationship is a problem that can affect both partners equally and that can lead to many other issues rearing their ugly heads and causing additional problems that might become too much to deal with at a certain point. That is why it is important to react on time and attempt to deal with the lack of affection between you and your partner. 

Some people perceive lack of fondness and tenderness to be less serious than other problems in a relationship, such as being involved in an overly toxic relationship or constantly experiencing relationship dishonesty from your partner. However, while not having sufficient affection might seem like an issue easily resolved, it’s anything but.

That is why PIVOT has designed both individual emotional coaching workshops, as well as group emotional issues workshops. We want to give you options and space to choose the type of workshop that would best suit you and your partner. Our experienced coaches will give it their all to help you with your relationship problems. Reach out to us today!

Unhappy Relationships: When Is The Time To Give Up?

Unhappiness in a relationship takes on many forms and originates for a variety of reasons. Sometimes, couples are unhappy because they feel bored in a relationship, or because both partners have lost the physical spark they used to have. At other times, there may be extreme jealousy present in the relationship, or perhaps a severe case of emotional manipulation. And, what is not spoken about often is that the unhappiness is generated from their own family of origin complications that have not been individually worked out. 

Some problems that make a relationship unhappy are normal and easy to resolve, while others require a lot of time, effort, and maybe help from professional relationship intimacy coaching experts. However, you first get more familiar with the characteristics of an unhappy relationship, and when it is time to leave for good.

What Does a Healthy Relationship Feel Like?

There is much talk about unhealthy, toxic, and unsafe relationships, and it is sometimes difficult for people to let go of a few relationship negatives and become aware that they are actually in a healthy and happy relationship. 

That is why it is also important to recognize which emotions are good in a relationship, and what are the positive aspects of being in a relationship that you can expect to experience on a daily basis. Here are some of the important characteristics of a happy relationship:

How Do You Know If You’re Unhappy In Your Relationship
  • There is mutual respect for space and privacy.
  • You and your partner understand each other’s needs.
  • You and your partner are able to spend quality time with friends and family.
  • You are comfortable enough to share and express feelings and opinions.
  • You feel physically and emotionally safe and comfortable with your partner.
  • You enjoy the time you spend together and are able to spend quality time apart.
  • You are able to resolve conflicts without hurting each other’s feelings.
  • You feel comfortable being honest with your partner. 
  • There is forgiveness if a partner makes and admits a mistake.
  • You and your partner have mutual tolerance for certain issues and problems.

What Are The Foundations Of A Healthy Relationship?

Every happy and healthy relationship resides on strong foundations. There are certain aspects of a relationship that allow you to build upon and continue to thrive both as an individual who is in a relationship and as a couple looking forward to a life spent together.

  1. Boundaries

    Mutual respect for each other’s boundaries and habits is favorable.

  2. Communication

    This is an important cornerstone of every healthy relationship.

  3. Trust

    It is essential to build trust with your partner in a happy relationship.

  4. Consent

    There needs to be consent for the things you and your partner do together. 

How Do You Know If You’re Unhappy In Your Relationship?

It is not easy to become aware of the fact that you might be unhappy in your relationship. Healthy families can be happy and also have ways to navigate the challenges that arise. When your family has many conflicts that are not resolved, the difficulties suffocate the chance to be happy.  

The same goes for relationships. There are many reasons why you might be unhappy in a relationship, and it is difficult to correctly assess them. However, there are some signs that indicate you’re not happy with your relationship. Let’s see what they are:

  • Your family, friends, and other interests keep taking priority over your partner.
  • There are few or no dedicated date nights for getting emotionally and physically intimate.
  • You or your partner are experiencing constant criticism. 
  • There is little or no gratitude in your relationship. 
  • Your sex life is not what it used to be. 
  • You’re finding it hard to say nice things about your relationship. 
  • You feel more and more alone each day.
  • There is hidden or open contempt between your partner and you.
  • You’re experiencing problems with stonewalling.
  • You’re starting to live a parallel life separate from your partner. 
  • Both you and your partner tend to hold grudges. 
  • There is a constant blame game going on between you and your partner. 
  • You or your partner seem to be picking fights on purpose. 

Why Do I Stay In A Relationship That Makes Me Unhappy?

Perhaps you’re not leaving your relationship because you’re not aware of just how unhappy in your relationship you are. You may also have an old wound of abandonment or neglect that you are protecting from surfacing if you would choose to leave. However, sometimes individuals realize they are not part of a happy and healthy relationship, and they still refuse to leave. Here are some of the reasons why you might still be part of a relationship you know is not healthy:

  • You feel like you’ve invested too much in the relationship and you’re not willing to see all your time and effort go to waste. 
  • Your feeling of self-worth is very low, which negatively affects your relationship standards, keeping in a bad relationship. 
  • You’re frightened of the alternative and of the unknown of being outside of a poor relationship you’re familiar with. 
  • Your partner is implementing methods of emotional and mental manipulation that make it difficult for you to leave without feeling guilty. 
  • You’re using once-present love and affection as an excuse to remain in the relationship and await for their potential return. 

When It Might Be Time to Give Up On A Relationship

Sometimes, all the effort and the love you put into a relationship is not enough to see it succeed and thrive. As difficult as it is, the best solution to the way you’re feeling could be to finish your relationship. 

However, making that decision is not easy, and you might not know what the tipping point for ending a relationship is. There are also factors that are important to consider which is why getting help to discern whether or not to leave is key.  Sometimes the relationship needs to have a hard reset.  This is possible and relationships can get a boost that results in a new beginning. 

Take a look at some of the signs it is time to exit a relationship:

  • You spend more time living in your past memories than enjoying the present. 
  • Your relationship is starting to bring more pain into your life than it does joy. 
  • Your partner is expecting you to change every little thing about yourself. 
  • You constantly have to justify your partner’s actions to yourself and others. 
  • You’re experiencing emotional, verbal, or physical pain from your partner. 
  • Your partner is putting little or no effort into your relationship. 
  • You do not share fundamental beliefs and values. 
  • You feel that your relationship is starting to hold you back. 
  • You’re constantly hoping for things to get better, yet they don’t. 
  • You simply do not feel the same way about your partner as you used to. 

PIVOT Relationship Intimacy Coaching Will Help You With Relationship Unhappiness

There are many reasons for relationship unhappiness. Some of them might be easy to detect, understand, and resolve, while others turn out to be a lot more difficult to identify and eliminate from your relationship. Feeling happy in a relationship is one of the things that makes it beautiful, and once that seems to disappear, it is easy to start thinking about ending the relationship. 

Why Do I Stay In A Relationship That Makes Me Unhappy

However, sometimes it is entirely possible to resolve problems causing an unhappy relationship, although it might take professional help to do so. Instead of giving up, why not reach out to experienced relationship intimacy coaching experts at PIVOT?

PIVOT is a retreat for struggling couples that provides understanding and love, and our qualified relationship advocates are here to help you get over your hurdles and find happiness with each other once again. We design group emotional intimacy sessions for couples, as well as individual emotional intimacy coaching workshops. Depending on your own needs and preferences, you can choose an option you feel comfortable with. Contact us today!

Apathy In Relationships: Causes & Solutions

Have you lost interest in things you once used to enjoy? Do you feel like you have no motivation to do anything in your life? 

It is perfectly normal to experience bouts of apathy every once in a while, but when it occurs often, it can have a significant impact on your overall quality of life, including your relationships and work performance. Emotional intimacy coaching and other forms of support can make a big difference if you’re feeling apathetic, so don’t hesitate to reach out. 

In the meantime, read on to find out more about apathy and how you can overcome it. 

What Does It Mean To Feel Apathetic?

What Is The Root Of Apathy

Apathy is defined as a lack of interest or motivation in activities and/or interactions with other people. When you feel apathetic, you don’t feel much of anything – activities that you used to enjoy no longer excite you and make you happy. You might lack the desire to achieve your goals or perform activities that involve your emotions or thoughts. 

While apathy literally means to be “without feeling”, it is nevertheless a feeling itself, as well as an attitude. Unfortunately, this attitude is one of unconcern, dispassion, indifference, listlessness, and detachment. You lack interest to confront the challenges in your life and turn to a life of passivity. 

The common theme that clients share when they are feeling apathy is “it’s hopeless”. 

While most people experience apathy from time to time, it is important to seek support if apathy pervades your life. If not dealt with, apathy can affect your social, professional, and romantic relationships. You may withdraw and distance yourself from your partner and become unhappy in your relationship, struggle to keep a job, or be unable to enjoy life in general. 

Symptoms Of Apathy 

You may be experiencing apathy if you: 

  • Lack the energy to perform everyday tasks
  • Expect other people to initiate or plan activities
  • Lack the motivation to deal with your own problems 
  • Lack the desire to have new experiences, make new friends, or learn new skills
  • Don’t feel any emotions when bad or good things happen to you 

What Is The Root Of Apathy?

People can fall into apathy for a wide variety of reasons. Some common causes include: 

  • Negative feelings and thoughts about yourself: when you feel worthless, useless, incompetent, and generally pessimistic about your life and abilities for a while, it is likely that you might move on to apathy and detachment. 
  • Major life events: feelings of distress, anger, and sadness caused by major events such as breaking off a toxic relationship or getting fired from a job can turn into apathy. Instead of feeling upset or angry, you are completely indifferent. 
  • Being stagnant in your life: if you’re stuck in a boring routine, working 9-5 shifts and performing the same activities every single day, it is easy to forget about your goals and dreams and then feel like you are not living your best life. 
  • Feeling worn down or overwhelmed: apathy can also arise from situations and events that leave you feeling overwhelmed, not bored. Nevertheless, you’re still left with detachment, low energy, and indifference. 
  • Mental health issues: apathy can also be a symptom of neurological and psychiatric disorders such as anxiety, depression, schizophrenia, Alzheimer’s, stroke, and others. This is why it is essential to seek support for your apathy sooner rather than later. 

Does Apathy Go Away?

It is entirely natural to feel apathetic at some point in your life, especially after a distressing event or prolonged periods of loneliness and boredom. For most people, however, apathy goes away with time, and they become motivated to chase their goals and maintain relationships once again.  

If the apathy is chronic, on the other hand, it may pervade your life and keep you from improving your life. The longer you remain stuck in your feelings of detachment, passivity, and indifference, the harder it will be for you to break the bubble. Fortunately, you can fight apathy with appropriate help and guidance, and perhaps with a little push from the people around you. 

How Do You Fix Apathy In A Relationship?

If you’ve been feeling bored in your romantic relationship or detached from your partner, you may be wondering if it’s better to leave and start over or work on your feelings of apathy to bring the spark back. Here’s how you can deal with apathy in your relationship:

Determine The Problem

What are the bad habits that allowed apathy to seep into your relationship? Think about how you communicate with your partner, how you feel about them, and what you think they feel about you. Are there some clear patterns that you’d like to change? Try to pinpoint when and how apathy started to grow. 


Make sure to speak openly with your partner about your feelings of apathy. Tell them how you’re feeling without guilt or blame, and discuss ways in which both of you could make the relationship work. Also, make sure to listen to your partner’s side of the story without placing blame and engaging in personal attacks. 

Engage In New Experiences

New activities and changed routines can help shake things up and hopefully allow you to overcome your feelings of apathy. Whether it’s going on a vacation or going on dates, try bringing something new into the relationship and try to reconnect with your partner. 

Dream Together 

How long has it been since you and your partner had a mutual dream you set out to accomplish? Discuss your long-term plans and wishes with your partner and try to create a dream that motivates the both of you. 

Attend A Relationship Workshop 

There are numerous workshops and retreats designed to help couples reconnect and deepen emotional intimacy. If you’ve been feeling apathetic, attending one of these specialized workshops may be exactly what you need. 

We Bring You Expert Solutions For Building Intimacy In A Relationship

Does Apathy Go Away

If you’ve been feeling disconnected, disengaged, and indifferent, know that you are not alone. At PIVOT, we provide individuals and couples with tailored guidance and support that can help them find the motivation to facilitate positive change. 

Our dedicated staff can help you heal through specialized individual coaching as well as a range of intensive workshops for deepening relationships. Get in touch with PIVOT today and start building a better future for yourself and your loved ones.