Category: Articles

Many modern relationships, if not most of them, start on the internet. While online dating and relationships weren’t always as popular as they are today, they have become increasingly common, especially in the present circumstances when many of us are unable to be close to the people we care about. 

If you need help recognizing red flags of online dating, seeking advice from a remote relationship coach may be exactly what you need. Read on to discover expert insights about maintaining online and long-distance relationships. 

Can Online Relationships Work?

Despite the exceptional popularity of online dating, many people still wonder whether such relationships can actually be worthwhile. Just like any other relationship, being close to someone online comes with its own set of problems and challenges.

If two people are committed to each other and willing to work on the relationship, then physical distance won’t present an insurmountable challenge. With dedication and trust, you and your partner can keep your long-distance relationship happy and healthy. Nevertheless, there’s no denying that maintaining intimacy online is hard work, and not all couples are equally willing or capable to commit to such a relationship. 

Can Distance Kill A Relationship?

While remote relationships can definitely work if the commitment is there, that doesn’t mean that things can’t go wrong. Here are some negative aspects of long-distance dating: 

• Physical intimacy may be a problem. While emotional intimacy is a crucial part of any relationship, being physically intimate has its own role to play. If you and your partner are unable to work on that aspect, you may start to harbor feelings of bitterness and dissatisfaction. 
• Your partner may not be as committed as you are. Not all relationships are equal. While you may be ready to go to great lengths to make things work, your partner may not feel the same. If you suspect that may be the case, speak with your partner openly. 
• Your social life might suffer. If you can’t spend enough time with your friends because of the obligations that your long-distance relationship entails, you may start to feel bitter and resentful towards your partner. 
• Communication can feel like a burden. As time goes on, you and your partner may not be as willing to speak to each other as much as you used to. If you don’t feel like talking to them every day, it’s possible that some of the attraction has faded. 
• Growing apart is a possibility. Different circumstances can lead you and your partner in different directions, and that’s completely normal. You shouldn’t feel obligated to stay if you start to feel like your relationship is coming to an end. 

What Should You Not Do In A Long-Distance Relationship?

Avoiding relationship pitfalls can be a challenging task if you are trying to keep things fresh remotely. If you care about your partner, make sure to avoid the following: 

• Don’t let your long-distance relationship be the sole focus of your life. 
• Don’t run away from arguments and try to be vulnerable. 
• Don’t lie to your partner and keep secrets. 
• Don’t pretend like everything is fine if you feel like it isn’t deep down. 
• Don’t make your partner feel bad about having a social life. 
• Don’t be too emotionally needy and clingy. 
• Don’t let your partner control your daily life. 
• Don’t assume that you and your partner have the same expectations. 

Of course, not all relationships are the same, and you and your partner may encounter wildly different issues than another couple would in your circumstances. Either way, you should make sure that both of you are on the same page in terms of your relationship expectations. If you can’t tell if your relationship is worth fighting for, then consulting professionals may be a good course of action. 

How Do You Keep A Long Distance Relationship Going?

Seek Guidance From A PIVOT Relationship Coach Online 

Relationships can be a source of great happiness and deep despair. No matter your circumstances, know that you are not alone and that you deserve to be happy and fulfilled in your relationships. Whether you are starting a new relationship online or trying to keep your long-distance relationship fresh, our insightful PIVOT Advocates would be happy to share expert advice and guidance. 

At PIVOT, you can find solutions to your relationship problems via in-depth remote relationship coaching for individuals or one of our expertly devised relationship workshops and retreats. It is our mission to help couples and individuals overcome their struggles and heal emotional wounds through valuable insights based on experience and expertise. 

Our relationship coaches are knowledgeable, friendly, and always willing to help. Contact PIVOT today and find satisfaction and happiness in your relationship. We are here to help. 

We all feel lonely from time to time, that’s just a part of life. In fact, loneliness is a universal emotion that is expressed in a unique and complex way in each individual. 

While loneliness is an integral aspect of being human, prolonged isolation can lead to serious consequences for your mental and physical health if left untreated. If you feel alone, whether you are literally isolated or have an emotionally distant partner, know that your feelings are valid and that you don’t have to bear this burden alone. Sharing your thoughts and feelings with a relationship coach may give you the solace you seek and help you overcome your loneliness. 

Keep reading to learn more about loneliness and discover ways of coping with feelings of isolation. 

How Do I Know If I Am Lonely?

Loneliness manifests itself in a myriad of ways. Even the individuals who seem sociable, energetic, and outgoing can be struggling with loneliness, although they may not necessarily be aware of it. What’s more, some people can be chronically lonely for years before they recognize the problem. 

If you aren’t sure if your feelings of loneliness are just a fleeting phase or something more severe, look for the following symptoms: 

• Your relationships stop at surface-level intimacy. Even if you do have family and friends in your life, you struggle with building deep, intimate relationships with them. You may not feel fulfilled in your relationships or fear showing your vulnerability in front of others. 
• You feel like your friends don’t truly understand you. You see your friends more as acquaintances than real, intimate friends. You don’t feel comfortable opening up and sharing your deepest feelings and thoughts for fear of rejection and abandonment. 
• You feel isolated even when surrounded by people. If you experience an overwhelming sense of alienation even when you are with lots of familiar people, you may be dealing with chronic loneliness. 
• You constantly experience feelings of low self-worth. Chronic loneliness can result in long-term self-doubt and constant negative talk. It can significantly decrease your self-esteem and leave you feeling inadequate, unworthy, and insecure.
• You feel drained after engaging in social interactions. Feeling exhausted or burnt out after being with friends for prolonged periods of time is another sign of chronic loneliness you should look out for. 
• You don’t have the right emotional support network. If you don’t feel like you can confide in your friends and family because you feel like they won’t care or understand, it’s possible that you simply don’t have the right kind of people in your life. 

Can You Be Lonely But Not Alone?

Absolutely. Being in a group of friends doesn’t eliminate feelings of loneliness, especially if you’re surrounded by the wrong people. However, even if you have caring and loving friends, you may still feel disconnected and isolated if you’ve struggled with chronic loneliness for a while. 

Feeling utterly alone when you are with friends can be a frightening feeling. You may feel confused about your emotions and even try to project your own fears on others, convincing yourself that your friends don’t care about you or understand you but refusing to show your vulnerability and connect with them on a deeper level. 

What Are The Effects Of Loneliness?

Loneliness can affect both your mental and physical health. Prolonged isolation without a good support network can change the way you see yourself and other people, lower your self-esteem, and even affect your brain health. Rumination and negative thoughts can spiral out into a vicious circle, deepening your sense of disconnection and alienation. 

What Loneliness Can Do To A Person

Without proper support and assistance, loneliness can severely decrease the quality of your life. Here are some common consequences of experiencing chronic loneliness: 

• Increased cortisol levels;
• Weight gain and weight loss; 
• Problems with logical thinking and concentration; 
• Severe antisocial behavior; 
• Substance abuse; 
• Sleep disturbances; 
• Altered brain function; 
• Increased risks of heart disease, diabetes, and high blood pressure; 
• Increased risk of developing dementia and Alzheimer’s; 
• Deep feelings of depression and anxiety; 
• Suicidal thoughts; 

If you are overwhelmed with feelings of loneliness, don’t wait for the problem to get worse. You can reach out and break your bubble, no matter how difficult it may seem right now. Professional coaches can help you heal your relational wounds and enable you to recognize the parts of yourself that make you special, worthy, and lovable. All you have to do is take that first step. 

How To Deal With Loneliness

Find A Relationship Coach Online And Fight Loneliness 

Whether you live alone or can’t find support in an unequal relationship, you can find happiness and create deep bonds in your life. All you need is a little push. Let our online PIVOT Advocates help you overcome emotional numbness and loneliness by providing expert guidance and support. 

PIVOT is here for you, whether you wish to learn how to create healthier relationships through our intensive retreats or find emotional support via relationship coaching for individuals and couples. You deserve to find balance and meaning in your life. Reach out to PIVOT coaches today! 

Establishing a deep, meaningful relationship with your partner, as well as other important people in your life, is what contributes to your mental health and well-being. In a healthy relationship, you’re able to connect with the other person, understand them on a deeper level, and both give and receive emotional support. 

In fact, emotional support is an essential aspect of a healthy relationship. It not only brings partners closer together, but also gives them the strength to overcome numerous challenges in their relationship and life in general.

This is why the lack of emotional support can be detrimental to both a relationship and a person’s mental health. Whether due to emotional intimacy issues and emotional distance in a relationship or feeling that you’re in an unequal relationship, some individuals may find it difficult to open up emotionally and provide their partners with the emotional support they need. 

What Is Emotional Support In A Relationship?

What does emotional support actually entail in a relationship? Is it simply encouraging someone to go after their personal goals or listening to them? While these are important aspects of emotional support, it also entails the feelings of compassion, empathy, encouragement, acceptance, and concern for your partner. 

In meaningful relationships, emotional support is offered from both individuals and brings them closer to each other. It also helps you establish a foundation for your future together. Additionally, the practice of offering emotional support provides a foundation for being able to resolve conflict kindly, see your partner from a place of reality, and attach securely to one another.

How Important Is Emotional Support In A Relationship?

Giving and receiving emotional support benefits both your relationship and you individually. 

• It deepens your relationship. Being in a supportive relationship brings you closer to your partner and helps you establish a deeper level of intimacy and trust. Knowing that you can rely on your partner and give each other support and compassion will also help you overcome challenges in your relationship in a healthy way. 
• It contributes to your mental health. Having emotional support from the people who matter to you the most means that you feel loved, cared for, and accepted for who you are. On the other hand, it’s not uncommon for people who lack emotional support to feel undeserving of love, believing that they are the reason behind this, which further reflects on their self-esteem. 
• It helps you overcome serious problems. As an important aspect of mental health, emotional support plays a crucial role in overcoming serious problems in life. Having a partner and family members who support you can help you deal with immense grief in your life or be an effective way to relieve stress and anxiety. 
• It helps you achieve your personal goals. Emotional support can also encourage you to go after your personal goals and work on yourself. If you lack emotional support, you can also lack confidence and determination to go after what you want and need. An emotionally supportive partner will believe in you even when you don’t believe in yourself. 

Since emotional support has such a great impact on relationships and personal growth, its lack can sabotage your every attempt to get closer to your partner. This is why many individuals decide to work on this issue through emotional support and emotional intimacy coaching where they identify the underlying problems and take steps to resolve them. 

How Do You Show Support In A Relationship?

If you believe that you haven’t been supportive enough in your relationship, you can take actual steps to change this. There are numerous ways to provide someone with emotional support, but the most important thing is to recognize the problem and work actively toward changing the negative patterns that have been sabotaging your relationship. 

Fortunately, expressing emotional support is an ability that you can grow into, especially if you believe that you have been the withholding one. 

How to emotionally support someone

How you express emotional support to your partner may greatly depend on the nature of your relationship and your personality. However, there are some common ways you can emotionally support your partner and show them that you are there for them. 

How Do You Overcome Lack Of Support?

However, what if you’re on the receiving end? That is, what if you’re the one not receiving emotional support from your partner? While this can be highly discouraging and have a negative effect on your mental well-being, there are a few ways you can deal with this and overcome possible challenges it presents. 

• Practice self-love and self-appreciation. If you feel that you’re too dependent on what your partner or other people in your life think of you and if you need their “approval” to do something, you should try to work on your self-esteem. Practicing self-love will help you become self-sufficient and don’t let the lack of support from others prevent your growth. 
• Determine whether you’re with the right person. If you believe that your partner doesn’t support or value you, they may not be the right person for you. While leaving them behind may sound difficult, it may be a better option than being in a distant, withholding relationship. 
• Try to understand your partner. If you believe that your partner doesn’t provide you with emotional support, try to determine why. Perhaps they feel insecure, afraid to open up emotionally, or hesitant because you’ve just started your relationship. Also, your partner may not have had emotional support in their life, so they don’t know how to give it. 
• Seek professional help. If you and your partner want to overcome relationship challenges, you should consider signing up for emotional support and intimacy coaching where you will be able to address your problems and work actively on resolving them. 

Overcome Emotional Intimacy & Support Issues With PIVOT

Enrich your relationship by learning how to give and receive emotional support through the PIVOT process. Our Advocates can provide you with personalized individuals coaching guidance that will help you deal with personal issues that may be hindering your relationship. We also enable you and your partner to work together on your emotional issues by joining intensive couples’ workshops where you can make a quick, yet long-term change. Start making progress today!

When you and your partner first started dating, the feelings of infatuation and excitement were so intense that even the least perceptive onlookers could testify with absolute certainty that love was in the air. But now that the honeymoon phase is over and the thrill of the new is gone, you aren’t so confident about the future of your relationship or your partner’s feelings toward you. 

The fear could be so overwhelming that you cannot even bring yourself to communicate these doubts and voice your concerns to your partner. Discussing the intimacy problems in your relationship openly would mean having to validate their existence, and that is a challenge in and of itself.

Yet the question keeps preying on your mind: does your partner love you as much as you love them? In other words: do you love your partner more than they love you? And if so, what do you do about it?

What Is An Unequal Relationship?

Deep down, you can’t shake off the uneasy feeling that you are trying too hard and that they are just not that into you. Every now and then, the thought that they might not care about you as much as you care about them runs through your mind. And what if someone new comes along and they realize the things between you are not working out? The thought that your partner might decide to break up with you fills your heart with dread. 

If you feel this way but cannot pluck up the courage to talk to your partner about it, you might  want to consider a codependency intensive or a related relationship course which you can attend in privacy and from the comfort of your home. 

But first things first: what is an unequal relationship and are you in one?

An unequal relationship is one in which one partner gives more than the other one. In other words, the relationship lacks balance and equality between partners. One partner’s thoughts, feelings and needs are more important than the other one’s. They are the so-called power member.

Unequal Relationship: The Red Flags

Many of us have made the mistake of pursuing romantic interests who are unavailable at one point or another. If and when this pursuit develops into a relationship, it may be an unequal one in which one partner is taking advantage of the other, while the other partner may or may not realize it.

But what are the red flags? Any signs that signal a power and control imbalance, such as if one partner:

• calls all the shots
• refuses to compromise
• doesn’t consider the wants and needs of the other person
• has the last word

Another common sign of an unequal relationship is if one partner is expected to pay for everything in order to earn the other partner’s affection.

As we grow older, we become more mature and more aware of our choices. What we may not realize is that we can easily fall into the trap of getting involved in an unequal relationship at any point in life. Is it the end of the world? No. Is an unequal relationship healthy? No. 

But is it worth staying in and can it be fixed? It depends, but it definitely takes a lot of work. You and your partner need to be willing to learn to communicate with each other and develop a mutual understanding so that you can both be free to be who you are and grow together.

How Do You Know Who Loves More In A Relationship?

Before listing the signs that may indicate you are giving your partner more than they are giving you, let us highlight the fact that not everyone shows affection in the same way. Each person is unique and so is the way they express their feelings. Some people may appear cold and distant because they have a different way of showing how they feel but does not mean that they love you any less than you love them.

Signs That You Are Giving More Than You Are Receiving

Before you know it, you end up in a vicious cycle, and you might not even notice the pattern. Since you always come up with excuses for their behavior, you give them more and more room to take you for granted.

Is It True That In A Relationship One Person Loves More Than The Other?

The answer is simple and straightforward: not in a healthy relationship.

In romance, like in all other aspects of life, finding balance is a challenge. But it is not impossible. A meaningful relationship that is based on lasting, healthy love is a relationship where both partners love each other profoundly and never take each other for granted. We all deserve a relationship just like that, a relationship in which we feel safe, seen, and heard, not one in which we have to settle for anything less.

Is It OK To Love Someone More Than They Love You?

It can be hurtful and confusing to come to the realization that a person we love might not love us as much. Think long and hard whether this is something you can live with and consult a professional if you are not comfortable talking it over with your partner. 

What matters is that you fully understand that things might never change. At some point, you may become overwhelmed with negative feelings, frustrations and unfulfillment, insecurity and resentment as a result of the imbalance. Do not ignore your gut instinct and your emotions, because they will not go away and may only get worse with time.

Accepting that you love your partner more than they love you may cause you to lose your self-worth and may even lead to depression. You deserve better and more, someone to give you emotional support and stay by your side no matter what.

Where To Go From Here? Let Us Shed Light On That.

If you are uncertain about the future of your relationship and need an unbiased professional with experience in emotional intimacy coaching to talk to on a deep and meaningful level, our individual coaching online sessions may be just what you need. On the other hand, if you and your partner are willing to work on your relationship and make it work, we also have online intensive workshops designed specifically for couples. Through our series of carefully planned-out online relationship courses, we can help you find a way to a more fulfilling life and a more fulfilling romance.

Do you feel like your partner is pulling away from you? Do they seem emotionally distant and you can’t tell why? Do they seem less interested in spending time with you than they used to be? You are not alone. 

Unfortunately, emotional withdrawal and unavailability are common in relationships. The signs may start to show up slowly and intensify over time if ignored. Building intimacy in a relationship is hard, to begin with, but when the emotional gap becomes too wide, both you and your partner may start to feel isolated, lost, and confused. 

Keep reading to learn why people become emotionally distant and what you can do about it. 

Why Is My Partner Distant?

Emotional drifting can occur for numerous reasons. While it’s easy to believe that only one side of the relationship is to blame, it’s important to understand that nurturing a healthy bond takes two, and both you and your partner may have contributed to the intimacy issues. 

Causes Of Emotional Distancing

Some common reasons why couples experience emotional distancing are: 

• Your partner needs some time alone. When you’re in a relationship, it can be difficult to find an opportunity to spend some quality time on your own, especially if you have children. If you notice your partner is spending more time on their phone or playing video games, they may be craving some time off.
• They are under a great deal of stress. Emotional withdrawal is a common mechanism for coping with stress. Your partner may be experiencing some turmoil in their personal or professional life which may be causing them to pull away from you. Try talking to them about the levels of stress in their life. 
• They may not feel the same way anymore. If you’ve been together for a while and haven’t really worked on deepening intimacy, it’s possible that your partner has mixed feelings about the relationship. Have a serious conversation about it, but give your partner some time to prepare. 
• You’ve entered a pursuer-distancer cycle. Your partner may consider you to be too needy and may withdraw because of it, which causes you to feel even more worried and abandoned, and in turn needier. If that’s the case, you can try to pull back for a while and see if anything changes. If you can’t pull back – it may be a sign that you have some attachment challenges that need to be addressed.
• You’ve entered a criticism-withdrawal cycle. This relationship dynamic develops when one partner in a relationship becomes highly critical of the other, constantly making them feel inadequate. The criticized partner then withdraws further and creates a deeper gap. If you’ve been harsh with your partner, try to be more gentle and see how it goes. 

What Are The Signs Of Emotional Unavailability?

Some individuals are naturally better at expressing their emotions and thoughts outwardly. While you may feel like you wear your heart on your sleeve, your partner may not be as comfortable with showing their feelings. If you feel like your partner is distant, look for these telltale signs of emotional unavailability: 

• They can’t describe their emotions;
• They struggle with showing affection; 
• They aren’t comfortable talking about your emotional issues; 
• They don’t give you emotional support; 
• They become defensive when you bring up issues in your relationship; 
• They invalidate your feelings; 
• They are often too busy to spend quality time with you. 
• The relationship feels one-sided; 

The first step towards bridging an emotional gap in your relationship is recognizing that there is a problem. If you are struggling to build a healthy relationship with your partner, consider reaching out to a professional relationship coach. With expert help, you will better understand the root causes of your relationship issues and discover ways to work together with your partner to change your relationship for the better. 

What Does Stonewalling Someone Mean?

Does your partner avoid any sort of discussion or cooperation when it comes to resolving emotional issues? They may be resorting to a defense-mechanism called stonewalling. A person who stonewalls will withdraw when you bring up a problem, dismissing your words and invalidating your feelings. They may say something like “you’re being unreasonable” or “you’re blowing things way out of proportion”, etc. 

You may encounter stonewalling whether you’re trying to address a concern in private or with a relationship coach. If your partner relies on deflection to render any discussion irrelevant or insignificant, it can be difficult to come at any kind of solution which can make you feel frustrated, unheard, and confused. 

How Do You Deal With An Emotionally Distant Partner?

Find Peace And Happiness With #1 Relationship Intimacy Coaching

Feeling unheard and invalidated in your relationship can cause you a great deal of stress and anxiety. The good news is, you can find joy in your relationship, no matter how alone you may feel. With help from our PIVOT coaches, you can reach emotional balance and nurture a healthy and lasting relationship with your partner. 

At PIVOT, we provide expert assistance to individuals and couples via carefully devised workshops and relationship-building retreats. We are here to help you find fulfillment and happiness in your relationships. Give us a call! 

Have you ever experienced the feeling of being emotionally numb? Maybe it’s happened during a very stressful event or during an argument with your partner.

For most people, this feels like a disconnection from your body and the outside world. Building intimacy in a relationship is hard as it is, but it’s even more difficult for individuals who experience emotional numbness. 

What Does It Mean To Be Emotionally Detached?

Emotional numbness or detachment is a complex and at times very persistent feeling that isn’t always voluntary. For many individuals, it comes as a result of past events that make them disconnect from their emotions.

There are situations when emotional numbness can be helpful. For example, being emotionally detached can save you from unnecessary pain if you use it to set boundaries with certain people or groups who demand a lot of your emotional attention or energy.

However, emotional numbness can also be harmful if you can’t control it, especially when it comes to building healthy relationships. 

How Do I Know If I’m Emotionally Numb?

It’s not always easy to differentiate detachment from other emotional states. Here are the signs that you may have emotional numbness. 

Signs Of Emotional Numbness

The common signs of emotional numbness include:

• difficulty creating or maintaining personal relationships;
• a lack of attention, or appearing preoccupied around others;
• difficulty being loving or feeling affectionate with a family member;
• avoiding people, activities, or places because they’re associated with a past trauma or event;
• unable to express emotion;
• difficulty empathizing with other people’s feelings;
• feeling like a stranger or outsider in your own life;
• feeling dead or empty;
• feeling meaningless, worthless, or hopeless;
• feeling as though you are sleepwalking through life;
• feeling a loss of control;
• feeling disconnected from your memories;
• feeling emotionally and physically tired regardless of how much sleep you’ve had;
• not being able to enjoy activities or hobbies.

What Causes Emotional Detachment?

Emotional numbness is usually a side effect of an insecure attachment to one’s caregivers in childhood. People who have been neglected or abused may develop this as a coping mechanism. 

For example, people who were neglected by their parents in childhood may binge on food in adulthood as a survival pattern to numb their feelings. 

Just as an alcoholic drinks alcohol to feel numb, a person with an unhealthy eating pattern eats food to binge, which causes isolation. This leads to self-neglect and repeats the childhood pattern of not being seen or being neglected.

How To Overcome Emotional Numbness

Our Emotional Intimacy Coaching Can Help You Find Happiness 

If you recognize any of the signs above, then just know that you’re not alone. Lots of people struggle with feeling emotionally numb. The good news is that you can be healed and experience self-acceptance so that you can have a healthy relationship with yourself and others. 

We recommend that you seek support from our online PIVOT Advocates to help you explore childhood issues and focus on healing your wounds with self-love and self-acceptance. Remember, you are worthy of love, happiness, and a healthy relationship. 

If you are ready to create meaningful connections with people and overcome feeling emotional numbness, then contact PIVOT. Our carefully designed individual coaching and insightful couples relationship building workshops can bring you the peace and happiness you seek. Contact us today! 

Many people seem to believe that vulnerability is a weakness, especially when it comes to dating and relationships. This couldn’t be further from the truth. Unless you are willing to open up and show your vulnerable side to a potential partner, you can’t expect to build a meaningful and lasting relationship with them. 

Dating with trust issues that cause you to put up walls is hard. Without vulnerability and trust, a relationship is unlikely to move past the initial stages without substantial effort from both parties. And if it does, it’s possible that the lack of intimacy would lead to more serious relationship issues such as infidelity and betrayal. 

Unless you want to perpetuate the vicious cycle of trust issues and failed relationships, you should learn how to be vulnerable in the dating phase. Read on! 

How Can I Be Vulnerable When Dating?

If you have built walls so high that nobody can see the real you anymore, it’s only natural that you’d experience some trouble while dating. Know this – eventually, what you are too ashamed to reveal- will come out into the open over time if the relationship begins to progress. 

It is not good to disclose everything on the first two dates however, not revealing certain aspects or not telling the truth because of shame can result in being dumped – causing more pain. Fortunately, you can learn how to be more vulnerable if you are willing to put in the effort. Here are some steps you can take: 

How Do You Let Your Guard Down When Dating?

If you’re still healing from past hurts, learning how to be vulnerable and trust again is bound to take time. While letting your guard down won’t be easy if your wounds are deep, remember that you deserve to have a healthy and happy relationship and that the past doesn’t have to repeat itself. 

Ways To Let Your Guard Down 

Letting your guard down will be easier if you follow some of these steps: 

• Communicate your needs openly. Letting a potential partner know what you are looking for in a relationship will prevent unnecessary disappointment. Being honest about what you want is the only way to get it. 
• Talk about your values and passions. Don’t be afraid to share your interests and passions with your date. They will be more likely to fall for you and appreciate you for who you are if they can see the passionate and quirky side of you. 
• Try revealing your fears. Similarly, you should strive to show the darker, more vulnerable parts of yourself if you want potential partners to get to know you properly. If a potential partner doesn’t appreciate this, they may not be the right person for you. 
• Be a good listener. Just as they should be willing to listen to you, you should make an effort to be attentive to what your date has to say about themselves. If you do so, they will feel more comfortable around you and it will be easier for you to trust them. 
• Love yourself first. You can’t expect to build a healthy relationship if you don’t value yourself. Practice self care and work on healing your past wounds before you commit to anybody else.  
• Accept and validate your emotions. There’s no shame in feeling weak, jealous, or insecure. Healing is not an easy task, so make sure that you’re not too hard on yourself and accept the fact that getting better will take time. 
• Learn to let the past go. Letting go of past trauma is a must if you want to create meaningful connections. Do what you can to make peace with the past and try to find ways to learn from your previous mistakes or misfortunes. 

Is Dating Harder In Your 30s?

Dating in your thirties brings its own set of advantages and disadvantages. Here’s why dating in your thirties can be both a blessing and a curse:  

You Know Exactly Who You Are  

When you’re in your thirties, you are much more certain about who you are and what you’re looking for in your relationships. On one hand, this can make finding an ideal partner easier since you have a better chance of recognizing compatibility and potential in another person. On the other hand, however, you will be much less willing to change and compromise if things don’t go your way. 

You Are More Serious About Dating 

If you have your career and social life figured out, it’s hard to find the time to play games. When dating someone in your thirties, you want to be certain that the relationship is not wasting your time. This makes you more likely to let unpromising relationships go much faster than you would in your twenties. 

You Have To Deal With Lots of Pressure 

If you are a woman in your thirties, you’ve probably heard the phrase “biological clock” at least once from your friends and family. If you are a man, people have surely reminded you that all desirable ladies are already married. Such comments can be extremely frustrating and learning how to ignore them is not exactly easy. 

Learn How To Let Go Of Fear At Our Dating Problems Workshop

At PIVOT, we believe that every individual deserves meaningful and healthy relationships. Our knowledgeable PIVOT coaches can provide guidance every step of the way, from navigating the infatuation phase of dating to creating a deep connection with a partner. 

We offer carefully devised relationship solutions for individuals and couples, as well as a range of intensive dating workshops in your home or at the Glass House, our residential facility where you can learn to facilitate lasting change. Give us a call!